Happiness~~

Once you were gone, I couldn't believe how happiness can overwhelmed me all the moment when I was with you..

How precious happiness can be nowadays...

One great woman said ...

At the end of life we will not be judged by how many diplomas we have received, how much money we have made, how many great things we have done. We will be judged by 'I was hungry and you gave me to eat, I was naked and you clothed me, I was homeless and you took me in.' Hungry not only for bread - but hungry for love. Naked not only for clothing - but naked for human dignity and respect. Homeless not only for want of a room of bricks - but homeless because of rejection.

-Mother Theresa-

Rise and rise again until lambs become lions

Hobby #2

Hobby #1

How To survive a Breakup ?

1- Intend to overcome the breakup:

Make a long-term commitment to yourself to get rid of breakup pain, you must be conscious to this decision and apply it as life goes by, when you treat anybody, handle any situation you must remember that you made a promise to yourself that you are going to heal your broken heart.

The most fatal mistake almost everybody does that you keep your unconsciousness drives you, you must control your feeling, and make a conscious decision to cure your broken heart.

I do this thing and it pays me every time, when I feel weak, I consciously convince myself that I am strong, and I began to act from this vintage point. In this case I said to myself: I am powerful. I am attractive, I can date any woman I want, I don't need this girl who dumped me and I deserve a better match for sure, this will deepen your self esteem, not necessary for you to have bad feeling for your missed love, on the contrary I hoped that she finds the perfect match for her, I hoped her the happiness, I know at this point we weren't meant to be for each other.

Have The Determination:

With Determination and real desire, you can acheive anything you want, you'll find magical doors to your goal where there were always high walls.

2- Fight all the unconscious desires that might ruin your intention!

Don't Just Fight Them, Make aClear Victory Over Them.

You can keep your conscious determination high and the matters will go very well with the healing process unless:

Sometimes that unconscious part of you tries to convince you that there is no point for your struggle and attempt to overcome your recent situation, this part keeps telling you: don't lie on yourself, face the truth! Don't be so optimistic, the life is cruel, Do you really think you are going to survive this?

We all face this situation and I think a majority falls into this trap - including me - after they are fired up with enthusiasm, come this part to ruin all the results that began to show.

3- Renovate your life!

Aren't there new thing you was dying to try, it is about time now, go shop for that new outfit, go for a strange cuisine in a restaurant you never tried before, adopt a new hobby you never tried before, take your best companions with you and make sure you have a good time with them.

When I was depressed that day I took a decision that it is now the time to learn how to swim, I had been busy for years and I looked forward to learn swimming, that was the time I learnt swimming and I enjoyed it to the maximum limits, I broke the "fear barrier" after 4 attempts, I can call myself now as a swimmer, this was one of the pleasures in my life I did not discover till I was out of an ending relationship, I feel now that this break up was a blessing more than a bad thing, and you will feel like this too if you had such an attitude .

It may be not the "new thing" that you try that will make you happy, but the idea that there are many things in life other than an ending relationship, you'll discover a "new you", you will be amazed by the new thing you can add, do and master in your new life, As I successfully did.

4 - Be Kind with yourself.

We all know that positive attitude pays you at the end, But some feels they are deceiving themselves if they adopted positive attitude in their lives, someone might say: " whom Am I kidding? my life sucks anyway, this good attitude thing doesn't work for me".

I discovered that in a breakup situation I must surround myself with a cloud of positive thoughts and messages, If you treated yourself very well, you'll get the best things coming out. On the first days I kept giving those messages to myself

- I am a good person.
- I deserve to be treated very well.
- I deserve a good person to be with.
- I must indulge myself and do the things that make me happy regardless of the consequences.

Someone might say:" it seems like I am lying to myself" but this is not true, your emotions and feeling are the things you made, If you feel you are capable of doing something then surely you can, otherwise you can't do.

If you feel pleasure when you eat a sandwich of Salami, just do it. Don't hesitate.

If a fancy luxury chocolate makes you delighted, just take a bite.

Do anything you feel uplifting and raising your morale, and you deserve it for sure.

5- Try the power of visualization.

Just close your eyes and try to visualize that you are the happiest living person on the face of the earth, you need to plan for this first, if you find happiness in money and power, visualize yourself in a vast mansion, with all the people around you are racing to make your dreams come true, just try to visualize all the little details of the whole picture visualize the green gardens , the swimming pool, the architectural design of your mansion, even the faces of the people around you, how you would prefer them to wear, if you did this for only few minutes a day you'll feel happy and change your mood.

If you find pleasure in traveling, just visualize yourself in the place you want to visit with all your heart, For example if you love to visit Paris, go collect many photos for this city, try to look at the photos and visualize yourself there with your best friends, playing, running, taking photos and hanging around at the street, in a café, or amusement park, it is amazing.

This might seem hard at first, but with little imagination and determination you can do it and enjoy doing it, you'll love this thing, I am now 100% recovered from my breakup but I still love to do the visualization thing because it gives me strength and joy in the darkest moment, this is very helpful although I have two disclaimers:

My disclaimer is: don't visualize yourself with your ex. This will give you bad results and will ruin your efforts to overcome the breakup process, my other disclaimer is : don't take too much time in the visualization process, I know it might feel very happy but you can not lose your time in the visualization you have a life to live, it is good to have some minutes to visualize and day dream but don't be overwhelmed with fantasy and live in a virtual world, a few minutes in the day is more than enough, you just repeat it when you feel gloomy or sad.

6- Anticipate the problems and deal with them.

Your healing will not be free of problems, in fact it will have bumps and obstacles all the time, your role is not to submit yourself and make your unconsciousness drives you, you must have a Conscious decision to beat these obstacles and defend your recovery regime with all your energy.

You must anticipate the problems, in fact there is hardship in forgetting your ex or getting over your lost love, when I was in this situation I used to identify these problems and write a clear solution for them on paper and immediately apply it, for example, I had too many sleepless nights, then I decided to make a butterfly swimming session in the dark of the night followed by a hot shower, this surely will dissipate the energy that will keep me awake and I fell asleep as my head touched the pillow.

This was my route to end one of my problems, I am sure everybody has his/her own creative way to overcome the obstacles.

Finally I proudly registered that progress in my diary and when I refer to it, I feel I achieved something, By God what is a successful life other than a series of little achievements and victories allover the road!

7- Don't rush the results:

Be sure of one thing, when you make an effort to end the pain of your breakup, you'll finally get out of the bottleneck, don't rush, don't sink again in the circle of grievance, you must struggle all the way, the sun will rise after the darkest moments of the night.

Just keep nourishing yourself, applying all the things that will make you happy, keep convincing yourself that you already have gone out of this painful stage of your life, and keep reminding yourself of this golden hint: " what will happen to you , is a clear and transparent reflection of what you think and what you believe".

Source : http://www.squidoo.com/Healing-A-Broken-Heart-From-Love

Dr Phil's pieces of advice

Does he really even make you happy? Be honest with yourself about the extent to which he's really meeting your needs. Chances are you're longing for the relationship that you wish it could be, and that you want to be in love with the person you wish he was. Dr. Phil reminds a guest: "There are times when you break up with somebody and you start missing them and you start thinking about all the good things. And then you're back with them for about 10 minutes and you go 'Oh yeah! Now I remember why I hate you!'" Don't kid yourself about what it was really like or glorify the past.

Don't put your life on hold. Every minute you spend focusing on your ex is a minute that's holding you back from a better future. Dr. Phil tells his guest, "As long you are obsessed on this guy, you will never put your heart, soul and mind into getting your life in order and starting another relationship if you want one." Set some goals and start putting your life back together.

10 Ways to Survive a Break Up

1. Friends and Family. I know this may seem obvious but lean on your friends and family. Spend time doing things together, not just talking and thinking about the break up. If this isn’t enough, you may consider a support group or counseling.


2. Resist the urge to beg. You want them back but not at any price. At the time it may seem the right thing to do but think about it. In the long run they will lose respect for you. This doesn’t mean don’t try to work things out. If there is a chance you can work things out, go for it. However, if your partner has made it clear that in their eyes, the relationship is over, begging will not help and may hurt the situation.


3. Make a change in your life. Find a new way to spend your time. Take a class, join a gym, adopt a pet, or volunteer. Do anything that will make you feel good about yourself. Your ego is probably feeling bruised right now. Find a way to counteract that.


4. Understand your mistakes but also realize that you are not a failure. Don’t beat yourself up. If you made mistakes, then yes, learn from them but dwelling on what might have been won’t help. It takes two to make a relationship, it also takes two to end one. You weren’t the only one who made mistakes. It may not seem useful to you now, but a lot of times the things you learned from this experience will make your next relationship stronger, as long as you make the necessary changes.



5. Start Dating. You won’t feel like it at first, but don’t stay away from other people for an extended period of time. Going out with other people can help the healing process and boast your ego.



6. Don’t fall prey to others. There will be people trying to sell you this or that, guaranteed to win back your partner. Don’t let people take advantage of you while you are vulnerable. If you do buy something, understand that while there is a chance it could help, there is also a chance that it won’t.


7. Take up a hobby. Learn something new. There is probably something you’ve always wanted to try but never had the time. You have the time, do it.


8. Don’t rush into another relationship. While starting to date can help you feel better, it’s not a good idea to rush right into another relationship. Take time to heal before making any commitments or someone will probably end up getting hurt.


9. Avoid dwelling on it. I know it’s impossible not to think about it, but, if you find yourself doing so for an extended period of time, find a way to take your mind off of it. Call a friend; go to the gym, whatever comes to mind. If nothing seems to work, try this: Make a list of reasons why you are better off now. This could include I have time to do the things I want to do. I can date anyone I want to. I can find a partner who will appreciate me the way I am and stop wasting time on a doomed relationship. Think about the things they did that drove you crazy, because there are some. Don’t look back with rose colored glasses and only remember the good things. Don’t have the idea in your head that if only we were back together I would be happy. Wrong. Wouldn’t they have a lot to answer for if you did get back together? Leaving you was probably the biggest mistake they will ever make. Let them dwell on it, you move on!


10. Build your ego. I’ve touched on this already but it is very important. Find ways to feel better about yourself. This could be anything from getting a haircut to buying some new clothes. You could take a class on self improvement. If nothing else, you should do this: Make a list of things that make you a great person. Don’t sit there and tell me you can’t think of anything. I don’t buy it. Try again. Are you kind? Patient? Intelligent? Cook like a pro? Can fix anything? There are things that make you great. WRITE them down and whenever you feel low, read your list and add to it. You are you and you are great so don’t let anyone ever make you feel that you aren’t.

By Patricia Fason

Gloomy dayzz

© Jeff Thomas // Azuzephre

Souless

© Jeff Thomas // Azuzephre

You've told me that:

1. you are happier now
2. you are less stressful
3. you performed better at work
4. you enjoy being single & doing all things on your own
5. your parents are happier now that you've broken up & etc
   

If this makes you happier .... You have all my blessing

Day 1

© Jeff Thomas // Azuzephre

The day I died

You were gone & you would never be back. All that was left was a bundle of memories & the unrealized dream to stay together for the rest of our life.

It's hard to forgive myself for this day came just because of me.

But, did it occurred in mind that I'll be a less pressure to you if you told me you were unhappy? Or maybe it won't be a pressure anymore years down the road? Was I not worthwhile for your understanding ? & you gave up on me just like that ...

Today, I have died for you have took away my happiness, heart & soul with you. No way that I'll love anyone anymore when I've already lost the bestest guy in the world.


© Jeff Thomas // Azuzephre

If only I knew

You told me that you've been unhappy for the past half year.
You : You've stay unhappy & swallow all your dissatisfaction for the past 6 months, so that it won't hurt my feeling & I can stay happy.
Me : I am so sorry that you've been unhappy for the past half year & I didn't even see it. If only I knew, I'll take back all that I've done that have upset you. I can even leave you so that you can be happy. I have always thought that it's your responsibility to be patient with my temper, stress & pressure. & it served you right that you have to listen to my scolding for all the things you've done. I didn't know when I put my pressure on it, it has been hell to you. If only I knew.

You told me that I didn't get along with your family as well as your ex"es".
You : For all the bad things i've said about your family, for not supporting your family, for making big fuss just for having to go to your family dinner & staying with your parents once we got married.
Me : I love doing all that. Especially with your company It's a great honour for me having to live with the most generous & kind family in the world. I don't think I can ever find any family that can accept a stranger to a close-knit family with such an open-hand.

You told me I was a pressure to you
You told me I was a task to you, seeing me was like having to wake up every morning to go to work
You told me I said negative things about you
Me : You should be given pressure coz you owe me
You : All the nagging, discouragement words & insensitive things I have said were pushing you away from me. Your feelings toward me was fading. Your 1st ever promise to me has long been forgotten as I was no longer the same person that you met the 1st time when you promised me that.
Me : If only I knew, all my selfishness & ignorance has been pushing you away from me


You told me I couldn't go back to my mom's house once we get married
You : I am selfish that I am taking away somebody's son with me
Me : !@#$%
.....
Me : I guessed what you mean is you want me to be by your side at all time. Cause you'll miss me. (I understand your mother didn't mean it when she said I go back t00 often)

PS : Given another chance, I will take back all the wrong things I did to you.
If only you didn't give up on me 6 months ago.

Angry

You told me that you've been unhappy for the past half year.
You told me that I didn't get along with your family as well as your ex"es".
You told me I was a pressure to you
You told me I was a task to you, seeing me was like having to wake up every morning to go to work
You told me I said negative things about you
You told me I couldn't go back to my mom's house once we get married

What is the purpose you want to talk? To rectify what we did for the goodness of our future partners?

This is all full of shitz... I hate you now. Given a choice, I will still do the same thing I've done for the past 3 years!!!

I pondered, what love is ...

I didn't know what love is until you came into my life

2 weeks ago : The big fat fight

It came out of no where. You threw the bomb to me out of a sudden. I thought you said that out of anger. Lil that I know, it's for real.

Week 1 : The break up